journal of a struggling vet student

omigod!! internet is working dito sa work.. mwahahaha!!

 miss you tabulas!!!

okay. let's just say i have the awful tendency to be attractive to non-attractive guys. there is something beyond their looks that seem to magnetize me. my one great love attests to that.

there's this guy in the the workplace whom really stirs me up everytime i would look at him tinker with the pc. you already know he's not attractive. maybe he's your average guy except he's a kid. he loves playing the bunso and display the cute antics which i find cute. another thing is he's a sensible talker. many times we get to be seatmates and minutes later were already talking about how inconsistent sharapova is or how godlike federer is. his reservoir of topics range from the mejo bastos to the mejo seryoso. whaha.. crush lang naman, just to clarify noh.

later i knew that the trainer also has a thing for him. mejo jelly naman ang lola mo ng konti. whahaha.

just a few minutes ago, after having received my painstakingly earned salary for the last two weeks, i left the office amidst the protest of my wavemates.

i never really had the intention of doing so, consciously. i thought i had gotten over the idea of leaving my job because of several factors which i am not to divulge, lest someone from work read this and have me blacklisted. i dont deny that every evening, i am engaged into a constant combat with myself about waking up and dragging myself to work. i have told myself several times that if i want a constant financial source to satisfy my wants, i need to stay with this job. i did everything i can to be distracted. i even took refuge in the fact that almost all my wavemates also experience this state. we would recount how we force ourselves out of the house and how we force feed ourselves with all those calls. but then again earlier, when a wavemate opened to me the idea that there is a possibility (yeah JUST a possibility) that the laguna stint would go, and add to that my utter frustration for having received my allowance so late that i was not able to make it to the bookstore to buy Murakami, my filled -to-the-rim subconcious kicked in and i suddenly decided right there and then to pick my bag up and leave the office without goodbyes. and while i was summoning my conversational skills so  could figure out how i would tell my parents, boom. I saw papa and dwight outside the mall waiting for my sister who works in greenwich. I had no choice, he saw my leave the house and he was so puzzled seeing me out of work at worktime. so i simply said i resigned. he asked about my next plans. i mentioned the proposed laguna stint. then i went off.

on the way i tried to justify the thing which to other people my look stupid: leaving a good paying training, two days shy of certification. add to that the fact that i've been topping the call scans. (kelangan talaga minemention?!) can it be because of the arrogance typical to a youth like me? partly. i cling to the idea that i am confident of my comskills and my grammar and my being from UP and all that. That call centers would beg on their knees and fellate me if necessary just to have me. work for them (see, i told you, youthful arrogance..) Or could it be also because of the people at work? Or more appropriately put, is it because of my ignorance of the real call center environment and the peple they contain? maybe. it was my first time and i thought people at call centers are supposed to be fatally efficient, smoothly organized and gramatically and enunciationally correct? (there, have me blacklisted come on!) that ends there. ahaha.. Or. maybe its because i realize that the call center pressure is just too much to handle, very much like what i have foreseen during the first day of training? I hope not. God, i hope not.

 But whatever, i have crossed the rubicon. i just have to formalize my action and send a letter of request for termination (not resig letter.) tomorrow, buy the murakami book, wait for the laguna stint if it pushes through, and spend a stress-free and sadly, salary-free holiday.

hapy holidays everyone. :)